Intro from Barb:

     

       If you are considering homeschooling a high schooler starting "midstream," you are probably in at least a little bit of turmoil right now. This page is packed with a lot of encouragement, inspiration, and practical help!  I hope that if you are in this boat, you will thoroughly read everything on this page before making another move or spending another dime as what's presented here is going to be life-changing, pivotal, and foundational for you. How do you spell "relief"?

    

  

R-E-A-D  T-H-I-S  P-A-G-E!   

   

    

   

 

 

Barb: I am occasionally contacted by moms wanting to take their child out of high school "midstream" and homeschool them. They are almost invariably "desperate, in panic, overwhelmed!!!!" ~ which actually happens to be the exact title of an email I recently received. Because I know many others are in similar shoes, I want to first share an excerpt from her email, and then my response, in hopes that it will be of encouragement to others needing to hear the same thing... (I have slightly changed a few things to protect her privacy and to make it make more sense to you.)

 

 

a desperate mom:  I am so discouraged. I am in panic too because I have middle school and high school children, and I am losing time. I can't afford a trial and error program. Your book Form+U+la, which I have learned about today in the internet, seems to tell me that I am too late to read it because I haven't read it 2 or 3 years earlier before I started homeschooling. I would like to change my whole approach to homeschooling, but am I too late? Please tell me what to do from here?

 

   

Barb:  First, the place this mom may have gotten the idea she is too late was from a multi-authored article here at my website called When to Read Form+U+la?  That is for those with younger children wanting to know when it would most benefit them to start reading Form+U+la; but it doesn't mean that mid-high-school is too late!  

  

Now, to speak to this mom, and anyone else in her shoes...  My heart goes out to you. I pray this will be a time during which you'll draw close to the Lord like never before. Not that you haven't! Just that I think this is what "going from glory to glory" is about.   (It only gets better!) ... And I pray, too, that you'll receive comfort, direction and practical steps to take. You are in a very good place already! 
   

My advice to you as we begin to delve into this first, relax, take a deep breath.    Be still and know that God is God, and that He has a perfect plan for you... And He will take you from right where you're at!!!  If your life is not yet in His hands, that is where you will need to start, as this is not a "do it yourself" approach.

     

My book is not going to be a program that either works or doesn't work; it's going to help you focus on what GOD wants you to focus on. It would have greatly behooved you to have read it even five years ago; but you didn't, and so God is going to help you right where you're at, and take you from here. It is NOT too late; it's just going to take a lot more focusing and undoing is all.    Get the book ~ the latest edition, not one with the gold and black cover; the one with the pictures of our family on the cover ~ and start reading it from cover to cover, and then start over again. There is a jumpstart plan you can use with your kids at the beginning of it, right before the first chapter. That will help you help them get going on a "lite" plan that will not be overwhelming. 
        

In the time before the book arrives I suggest you get your kids occupied, the fix yourself a nice pot of your favorite beverage, set yourself down at your computer, and PLANT yourself at my Homeschool Oasis. If it's pretty much all you do for the next four days, it will be WELL worth your time!!!!!    I have spent many many hours creating for people EXACTLY in your shoes. There is  much to think about and consider where you're at; it can feel very overwhelming. But just keep pressing into God as you continue reading. He WILL show you the way through this. If you come to an article (at the Article Chart, which is where you'll want to spend a good portion of your time) that's just not making sense, skip on to the next one, but consider coming back to it later, as it will probably make more sense at another time. Maybe even print out the Article Chart and check off articles as you go. There will be very FEW that will not apply to you, but some will be more helpful now than later, and visa versa.
     
"Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him to act." God is wanting to pour out abundant GRACE on you right now. Let Him minister to your heart. My pastor recently spoke on "Being Desperate." The BEST place we can possibly be is DESPERATE. If we are not desperate, God does not have free reign to move and work and redeem. That's all you need right now ~ for God to REDEEM. You have already made it to the starting line, where many never even get! They just float along, oblivious to the fact that God has something better for them. 
   

One gal who wrote to me had a good way of putting it ~ that it's not another program, but something very different...
   

 

a grateful mom: "Thank you so much for your courage in presenting a message which seems so eccentric to the masses who have been deceived for so long. God has laid it on my heart to pray for you on a regular basis. I believe He has chosen you and Marilyn (Howshall) to draw families back to Himself. Your vision for the generations is one of the things God had been showing my husband and me over the last few years. It is so exciting to see that God is working in many ways to get that message out to His people. Your ministry carries with it such huge responsibility. As I was teaching my little group of 10 or 11 moms, it was almost frightening to realize they were actually listening to me and would very likely change their methods of education based on what I said. I became very aware of how important it is to stay close to the Lord, so that it is His message and not my own that is going out. Your writings are such an encouragement in that area. Always pointing me to God and His ways not just to some new educational philosophy."

 

 


an in-process mom:  "The Lord began my undoing about five years ago. It has taken every bit of that time to do an un-religion work on me and now it looks like He is beginning an un-schooling project on me. It is all truly a paradigm shift in my way of thinking, but brings joy and peace. I have a 16 and a 12-year-old. There have been many tears and much conflict in my efforts to school at home the last 5 years. That small still Voice has tried to tell me to do things differently but I just didn't get it."

 

 

Barb: I don't think it's ever too late; it just may take a lot more to redeem a situation. The more hardened a heart, the longer it may take to soften it. The more bad fruit in a life, the more cleaning up and cleaning out will be needed. The more off-target our thinking, the more it will take to get it set aright. But I don't think it's ever too late, until your children leave home.
   

Next I want to share a letter from Donna Heck, my Senior High Form+U+la list shepherdess and online secretary. (She had been sharing much wisdom and experience from her heart for a couple of years, so I finally nabbed her and gave her a couple of official titles!) 

   

Donna answered the question "Is it too late to start?" to one who was asking it on the list, but if you are asking the same question, her answer is directed to you too!

   

   

Donna: You were wondering if by beginning this late in school (age 16) you will be able to complete the requirements and graduate on time. Part of this question/answer will change as you read Form+U+la and you come to realize whose "requirements" you are questioning. But let me say this; my older son came home to homeschool at the same age as your son. He is ADD and was being passed simply based on his age ~ not his ability. The two years we homeschooled him were the best years of his school life!  (Those were HIS words!)  

     

Not only did the Lord equip him with the knowledge that He wanted for my son, but we had the most wonderful discussions and time together! I saw his anger and frustrations drain away. He had absolutely NO self-esteem when he left public school and that began to come back as we spent time together. Here was a boy that felt he could NEVER go to college...  but he did! 
     
So, is it too late? Well, I guess that depends on what you're measuring against. God "redeemed" the wasted years in my son and gave him so much more than we ever dreamed he could achieve! I hope you will choose this path.

~ Donna Heck   

 

 

Barb: Coming up next is the response I received from another homeschooling mom when I asked on the Senior High Form+U+la List if anyone had any experiences with taking a child out of public school part way through.  This gal, Sheilah, welcomes email from anyone in a similar situation who would like to talk to someone who's "been there done that".  Having started homeschooling our kids when they were 4 and 5 years old, I don't have this experience.  I can encourage, but I can't help as one who has done it and knows what's it's like from the inside.

 

 

 

an encouraged mom:  In response to taking a "mid high-schooler" out of public school, I can only see great results from my situation. My 17-year-old son got into a little trouble at public school and I had already taken my daughter out for the same reason four months prior to this. I was "told" that I couldn't take him out at that point, but I was so desperate to rescue him from the school, his "so called friends" and other outside influences, that I listened instead to God. I really figured if all else failed, he could at least get his GED. I didn't opt to go that route, as I wanted him at home to finish his high school. I also wanted to take advantage of the dual enrollment program at the local community college. I signed him up for the next semester and he started with just one class. I knew (or felt very strongly) that he would not have chosen to go to college or make much of his education or training if he continued on the route he was taking while attending public schools. He finished his first college course with a 93 average, Praise God! He is so awesome to help us in our time of need! My son does pretty well with his homeschool work, but he is like every other boy who has to be reminded of what is expected.
    
Most of all, I see "good fruit" in him because we have more time together as a family, we can talk much more, the "bad" influences are gone, he is getting much more training in what's most important in life, and we have quite a bit of support at our church for homeschoolers, so he doesn't feel alone. The Lord has brought each one of my three children home, one at a time and I am so glad He did! He didn't overwhelm me, He gave me each day "one step at a time".
        
In Christ,
Sheilah Hughes; Jacksonville, NC

 

 

     

Barb:   And finally, last but certainly not least, we get to the "meat 'n' potatoes" of what I want to present to you on this topic. Marilyn Howshall of Lifestyle of Learning has some very helpful things to say on this topic! Because itt is long, I made it into its own separate article.  Please read the whole thing! Of anything that's been said thus far, this is going to make the most impact on you. It will also possibly be the most difficult to receive if you are in a difficult place. What's coming next is going to make the most difference in your life.

          

 

Marilyn Howshall: answers the question:  How Do I Begin to Develop a Lifestyle of Learning with a Child Who is Half-way through High School?

 

 

 

Please do NOT skip this!

Read it all and then hit your

back button to return here

 

 

Barb:  So where to start at this point? This totally depends on where you're at right now, whether or not your child is already out of school, how imperative it is that they get out now (if still in), and what your most immediate needs are. Since I don't know your specific situation, the "one-size-probably-doesn't-really-fit-all" answer I'd give would be to start by getting Form+U+la (the latest edition, with the pictures of our family on the cover; that's the only "latest edition.")  The very first chapter of that has a "Jumpstart Plan" that you can get your student going on today!  That will get your student occupied ~ without spending a mint on curriculum ~ and free you up to start getting some vision and understanding. I highly suggest you not buy any curriculum until you have read Form+U+la from cover to cover!  You will save yourself a wad of money!  Just start at the beginning of Form+U+la and read all the way through, not skipping a single thing. Pray as you go and let things sink in. Don't allow the enemy to get you off-track with making you feel like this book is a bunch of stuff to do!  Form+U+la is not "one more thing to do" ~ which you do NOT need!  It frees you up to HEAR GOD for your own family!!!  Here's what one homeschool mom said: 

   

"This is the re-education in my thinking that had to take root to relieve the "pressure of doing it all."  Even though it took several years (I'm a slow learner...it didn't have anything to do with the way Barb communicated it), realizing that Form+U+la is not "one more thing to do" made all the difference in my attitude towards high school and what we were trying to accomplish in these last years of homeschooling. It was freeing for us and I pray that those who read Barb's material will see that up front!
    

You do realize, I hope, that home education is more about the parents than it is the kid. Kids, yes; but what's going on in the mind of the ONE bus driver is going to impact the entire busload of people. So it is vital and non-optional that your focus start with renewing your own heart and mind!  

  

The jumpstart plan isn't all your high schooler needs!  He needs a new mindset too!  (And, by the way, "he" covers both guys and gals!)  Coming out of the system is one thing ~ and a very good thing!  But getting the system out of your student (along with you) is just as important!  Intersperse your own reading with talking with your child about the changes taking place in you and the new ideas you are learning, which will help the needed changes start coming about in your child's thinking.  Otherwise you'll just end up falling into the "school at home" trap!  And, believe me ~ and hundreds who have walked that path and "crashed and burned" ~ it is a hard path to get OUT of!  

   

Use your child's walk with the Lord as the focal and motivating point.  Does he love the Lord?  If not, that's where you need to start, by lovingly bringing him to the Lord.  If he already does, then he's going to want to follow God and seek His way.  You, as the parent, have been placed over him for this season of his life for a reason ~ a GOOD reason.  Be assured that what you are feeling in your heart did NOT come from the world, but from God.  Talk about what he wants in life and how he thinks he's going to get there. I'm not just talking about "submission to parental authority" here.  This is important, but you want to engage is HEART AND MIND; not just "righteousness."  God will honor that, but your child needs to be discipled and gain understanding, not just walk in what he feels he wants. I don't remember if you've read Wisdom's Way of Learning but that, along with just about ALL of Marilyn's other books will help you tremendously in gaining the understanding and vision you need at this point. "Without a vision, the people [homeschoolers] perish."

You might also have your child read our daughter, Sharnessa's Letter of Encouragement from Sharnessa at my website. She wrote it to a boy who did NOT want to homeschool anymore.

  

But first and foremost, seek God and His perfect will for you and your student!  He has a plan for not only your life, but for how to homeschool and make the most of these precious years!  He will redeem "the years that the locust has eaten" ~ but only if you let Him, and let Him lead you!  We don't get to do it "our way" and expect to have God's blessings and peace.  And that goes for the education of our children as much as ~ if not more than ~ anything! 

  

So to get back to the original question...  "Is mid-high school too late to start homeschooling?" ... My final answer is:  It depends a great deal on how teachable your student is, but probably even more on how teachable YOU are!

 

 

    

         

 

 

 


 

 

 

Home    /   Article Chart

 

 

I got the photo for the

title graphic at Pixabay.